Want to speak to someone immediately? You can call me on 07931 500783. In person or Zoom available.

Sanitising suffering
Apr 06, 2012
terryburridge

A couple of years ago we were in New York and, inevitably, went to the 9/11 site. From a sightseer’s point of view there isn’t much to see. It’s mainly a building site and all very impersonal. On the way back, however, we passed a small chapel with a cross in front of it. What struck me was that the cross was made out of some iron girders from the wreckage of the bombing and had been made by some of the workers involved in the rescue work. It is not a “pretty” cross. It just stands there as a powerful symbol. A note in front of it says that this is only a temporary home. It would eventually be moved to  a 9/11 museum.

I found this so sad. In its current location it is part of the landscape of 9/11. It is rough and ready and stopped me in my tracks. I found it a fitting memorial to suffering. (Coventry Cathedral has a similar piece. They have a sculpture of the head of Christ made from the metal of a car crash. Another good fit.) Putting the 9/11 cross into a museum will sanitise it. It will become a piece of art to be photographed by eager tourists who will add it to their “9/11 Experience”. Saint Paul talks about the “offence of the Cross”. He seems to have understood that a cross was about death . suffering and pain. There was nothing romantic about being crucified. It was slow, painful, humiliating and irrevocable. As was 9/11 or 7/7.

Suffering is not romantic. It hurts and all too often demeans. Certainly for some people it can be turned into something creative but that is the headline story. The small print tells a story of struggles with depression and despair. With fury and impotent rage. With the question “Why?” being asked with no expectation of an answer.

9/11 has no “answer”. Individuals are still working to come to terms with their loss. Or with their guilt at having survived it. Their struggle is not sanitised as a museum exhibit that is enclosed in an air conditioned museum. It is on daily display, exposed for all to see. And we find this uncomfortable. Much better to visit it and leave. But perhaps that’s why the 9/11 cross should be left alone. That way it is seen  everyday by ordinary people. Who are those who will keep 9/11 alive.

 

Don't give up

An early lack of love and care leads to people struggling to succeed
By Terry Burridge 07 May, 2024
It’s an experience I’ve seen a lot in my clinical work - people struggling to succeed in their life due to an early lack of love and care. They might come to see me for anxiety or depression but what soon unfolds is a gap.
Looking beyond the obvious in counselling
By Terry Burridge 25 Apr, 2024
Giving an honest answer to a client's question of what is within them needs to be done, but needs to be done with care and understanding of the things that might not be obvious.
By Terry Burridge 26 Mar, 2024
More thoughts on depression and the role of suffering.

““Out of your vulnerability will come your strength.” 

Sigmund Freud

Counselling can’t change what life brings – but it can help how you respond to it. Talking with a counsellor gives you the chance to step outside yourself and look at your life from a different perspective.

FREE DOWNLOAD

10 questions that can change your life and bring you clarity

Not quite ready to make that call? I have created these questions so you can get curious about your life

Share by: